Matlok's Blog

Matlok's Blog: Is about many things that interest me, Matlok! It will cover motivational topics that help us kick our butt's into gear and achieve awesomeness! It will cover things of interest to me such as Information Security, Networking/Technology, geeky stuff (my day job). It will also be about funny things, topics that benefit your health and spiritual things that nourish your soul. I will try to provide just the right balance of topics for everyone including myself to enjoy.

How Successful People Think

Today my thoughts come from John C. Maxwell's book, How Successful People Think.

If you would prefer to listen to an audio recording of this post click here

When I hear the word "successful" many things come to my mind.

I think of someone who seems to have it all together, a person who takes good care of their family, someone who is doing good as far as money and material possessions go. It could also possibly be someone who is in good health, or it could be someone who is simply content and at peace with themselves, or maybe even someone who is focused on being successful in the next life by serving God and others in the process.

I say that to say that I cannot and will not try to define success for you. However, I do believe the truths that Maxwell lays out in this book can enable any one of us to move towards what we view as our definition of success.

Read on and I will share some of the highlights from "How Successful People Think".

Whatever comes to your mind when you think of success, this is a book about how successful people think. This book is primarily concerned with the thought process that enables people to be successful.

He says in his book "Thinking is something that we rarely think about".

I hope after you read this post, you will think more about your thinking and better yet, go out and read Maxwell's book to get even more in depth on this important subject. Here is where you can get the book here if you decide you want to read more.

Maxwell says "Reject popular thinking, think for yourself." Another similar quote I like that was not in the book, but from Mark Twain is this, "Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect."

I ask the question. What thought processes in your life are a result of just following what everyone else is doing?

One big concept from the book is "If you want to change your life, change your thinking". This is a critical concept. The Bible similarly says "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind" Romans 12:2.

In other words, the only way to have a transformed life, comes through what you are feeding your mind and how you are using your mind. The proper operation and control of the mind is a critical aspect of becoming who you were meant to become.

The good news is that We can all change the way we think. Today is a new day and you are reading this post.

You have a great opportunity right now! You can literally start a process today that could drastically impact your life and has the potential to positively affect generations to come.

Maxwell writes "You are today where your thoughts have brought you. You will be tomorrow where your thoughts will take you."

I think this is a very true concept that many people unfortunately miss. At the end of the day if you don't like where you are, or sense yourself getting in a rut, not being challenged, or not fulfilling what you believe you are called to do. I suggest you perform an objective evaluation of any thinking trends that you may have in your life. In one of my previous posts The Danger of Defending What We Are Doing I talk about the danger of defending the status quo in our lives and how it is better to change who we are, rather than defending who we are. Changing our thinking is one of the key ways we can do this.

In Maxwell's book he points out what Socrates said, "An unexamined life is not worth living." Make sure to examine how you are thinking and as a result, living from time to time.

He also wrote "that we need to look back to appreciate what comes ahead." Shakespeare said that "Experience is a jewel". It is important to learn from the good and bad experiences of life and view those experiences as a treasure to be cultivated.

One often missed point, is the value of other people's experiences. You have the opportunity to read and learn about other successful people who have "been there, done that, got the t-shirt." I have learned that learning from other people's experiences can benefit you greatly.

There is no shortage of biographies, historical accounts, etc for you to get started! Why try to go through everything for yourself when there are thousands of years of experience documented for you to learn from today!

As we see there is no shortage of good ideas and experiences out there, a quote from the book says

"The difficulty lies not so much in developing new ideas, as in escaping from the old ones." - John Maynard Keyes

As you look at your life and reflectively examine your current thinking trends, recognize that there is no shortage of proven and supportive ideas that will be new to you, however the greater challenge is pin-pointing and escaping from the old ideas that have become engrained in your life.

One step you can take is to surround yourself with people who are smarter than you. He says in his book "Smart people collaborate with other smart people. Surround yourself with people smarter than you." This simple step can help you stretch your thinking.

Michael Dell, the founder of Dell Computers said "Never be the smartest person in the room. And if you are, I suggest you invite smarter people - or find a different room."

Maxwell says that "Smart thinkers expose themselves to different ideas and types of people."

The question I ask you is. What kind of people are you surrounding yourself with?

He also talks about the power of big thinking. He says to "Think big to be prepared".

How many times have you seen someone seize an opportunity that seemed to be placed on their lap?

I am not saying that every person who gets an opportunity was thinking and preparing for the big picture ahead of time, but I am saying that those who do think about the bigger picture and prepare for opportunities in advance are often ready and actually attract more opportunities to themselves.

This concept is not much different than people who are purposeful about changing their eating and exercise habits to get physically fit. You have to be purposeful about it to see effective, lasting results.

As you think about the big picture and the future, don't lose sight of where you are right now and how that fits into the bigger picture. Maxwell writes that

"Seemingly mundane, trivial details lead up to the grand scheme. Even the most medial task can have significance."

This is especially true when you do what you are doing with excellence and a good attitude. Just because you are not necessarily where you want to be today, does not mean that you will not get there.

How you think, act and respond to your current situation will directly impact your future opportunities.

This brings us to the culmination of this post and a foundational concept in the book. There is a quote in the book by Winston Churchill that says

"There comes a special moment in everyone's life. A moment for when that person was born. When that moment comes, that person seizes it."

This quote from Churchill may excite you, or it may even scare you.

I hope it more importantly motivates you to continue to grow, to continue to cultivate your thinking and be prepared for that special moment that you were born for!

In closing I will use the wise words of the most interesting man in the world (Dos Equis).

Oh, okay, at least what I think he would say about this subject!

"Stay thinking my friends!"

If you would like to also listen to an audio recording of this post click here

The Danger of Defending What We Are Doing

This post is a result of a discussion with a friend...

If you would prefer to listen to the recording of this post click here

During lunch, without much thought I said in our casual conversation that there is a danger in defending what we are doing.

When I said it, I joked that this may make a good post one day and stored the note in the Evernote App on my iPhone....(you're welcome Evernote and Apple for the free advertisement!).

I think I also winced at the realization that this is the very thing I had been doing in a situation I was facing.

We have heard it said that the best defense is a good offense. In a football game, if a team can get points on the board and gets a good lead, the defense will appear to be better. An amazing play and score by the team who is down by 21 points in the 4th quarter usually doesn't reflect too poorly on the defensive squad on the field.

This is not meant to be a case against defense, or minimizing the importance of defense. We could argue that a good defense neutralizes an opposing offense, evening out the odds of the engagement.

The fact of the matter is I am not talking about football. I am talking about our lives. The game that is going on is the one within our mind. I think that in a sense each of us has a competition waging inside of ourselves.

This battle is between us taking a defensive stance and defending who we are, or taking an offensive stance and changing who we are.

Which brings us to the "The Danger of Defending What We Are Doing". This is not to imply that what we are doing is wrong. It may be the best thing for us at the time, note I did't say the danger of what we are doing.

When we become "defensive" about our decisions for how we choose to live our lives, we should take a hard look at why we feel the need to defend, or get defensive?

Is it because we are trying to convince ourselves that our current state is a result of circumstances out of our control? Or is it that we fear the prospect of actually trying to make changes, as if it may invalidate our current course, or worse yet validate the "critics" in our lives?

Whatever the reason, I propose that whenever we sense ourselves getting "defensive", we should shift our focus to being offensive instead.

How does this look?

Here is one example. Instead of convincing ourselves that all our problems are external and working hard to defend our current state, take a moment to reflect upon how I can think and act differently to change myself and my situation.

The mastery of oneself is a task that is difficult indeed. If you don't agree, try to change your eating habits and you'll get a quick reminder of how hard it is. Just because it is hard, does not mean it is not worth it.

I recently heard a quote from Andy Stanley that resonated with me. He said it is easier to educate a doer, than activate a thinker.

In the arena of the mind, defense is often a mental exercise that amounts to thinking about reasons for us to stay the same. Contrastingly, offense is concerned with taking action to change course and actually apply lessons learned.

As with any strategy, there is a time for each stance. I am not saying defense is a bad thing, or that we should not defend certain aspects of our life. One aspect that may be worth defending, is our faith, or core values. I would also argue that one of the best defenses of our faith comes from living a changed life rather than just having a good theological argument. It's more about what we do and how we are actually living than what we are saying in and of itself.

I am saying that it seems that the people who are most successful, spend more time acting vs sitting down, crossing their arms and defending what they are doing.

There is value in the consideration of a change of course in what we are doing.

We have probably all heard that the definition of insanity is repeating the same and expecting different results. Now using the term insanity is somewhat extreme, and some would say downright inaccurate, I don't disagree. However, I think most of us would agree that it is usually not in our best interest to defend the status quo, if that status quo does not appear to be working.

Right now you have a choice. You have an opportunity to learn something new and act towards implementing that change in your life.

Are you going to quickly say this doesn't apply to me and move on? Or will you take a moment to address the elephant in the room of your mind and work towards getting offensive and making meaningful and significant change in your life, instead of falling into the pitfall and danger of defending what you are doing?

Want to listen to the recorded version of this post click here

Count Your Blessings....in a Spreadsheet

Count Your Blessings....in a Spreadsheet

If you would prefer to hear an audio version of this post, click this link.

Count Your Blessings...in a Spreadsheet

Today I am thinking about something I heard some years back. August 5, 2010 to be exact at the Global Leadership Summit. It was during the Jim Collins presentation More about the session here. In case you don't know, Jim Collins is a business thought leader who has studied what makes companies great and successful and has authored books such as "Good to Great" and "Built to Last". Bottom line, he is the real deal and we would be wise to listen to his advice. You can read and learn more about him here. His session was very good, but it is not the point of this post. It was one comment he made in his session that has always stuck out in my mind since I've heard it.

That comment was this:

"Count your blessings. Literally, count them in a spreadsheet, and do not stop until you get till at least 100. When we begin to account for all the good stuff that has happened to us that we did not cause, it's humbling."

This quote leads me to ask you and myself the question. What are you focusing on? Are you focusing on the bad in your life. Are you looking at the "misery" in your current state? Maybe you're in a job that you don't like, or are working in a field that you are not passionate about?

You can focus on that. To be clear, you can and should be aware of what is going wrong in your life. We should not be in denial and oblivious to what is not working in our lives. Quite the contrary, you should be brutally honest to yourself and your current state. This is actually the only way to make lasting change.

So it's clear we're not talking about denial. The better question is "Does dwelling and focusing on what is going wrong in my life really help me?"

I think most would agree that it doesn't help.

It is much better to focus on the things that are going right. This lines up quite well with Jim's point about Counting our blessings.

It can be seemingly simple things that we can count as blessings...like I'm alive, I have a roof over my head, I can read, I have hearing, I can walk, I slept in a bed last night, I have a job (even if it is not your favorite).

These things may seem like basic things, especially in America, but try experiencing not having any of these and you will appreciate them much more!

In the recording I talk about if someone is about to get into an accident and are trying to miss hitting an object, "studies say" (like how I interject that overused, often untested phrase!) that the person will be more likely to hit the object as you are drawn to what you're focusing on, even if the purpose of your focus is to avoid it.

With that in mind, I propose that the more you focus on the positive, your blessings, the better chance you'll have to experience even more blessings in your life.

Similarly, you focus and dwell on what is going wrong, the more you will experience more of the same.

One example of the power of focus that many of us are familiar with and may have experienced. You are looking for a certain model of car you want to buy and all of the sudden you see it everywhere. It's not that the car wasn't there before, it's just that you didn't see it cause you weren't looking for it.

This same principle applies to counting our blessings. The more aware and focused on the blessings in your life, the more blessings you will start to notice.

I want to emphasize again that focusing on the positive, is not meant to be a denial about your current state. In one of my Jon Acuff book reviews earlier, he says "you have to be brutally realistic about your present circumstances and wildly unrealistic about your future circumstances.”

There is tension in that phrase, but the two are not in contradiction.

For example, if you are sitting on a mountain of debt, you can't ignore it and think it will just go away on its own. You need to develop a plan to tackle it and focus on working that plan with the focus towards the future of being debt free.

This is how you don't deny your reality, but still maintain a positive, future focus of the possibilities.

When you do look at the negative, just figure out how you're going to change it and take action and move on to your positive goals.

The first action you can do after you read this is fill out a spreadsheet with what you are grateful for in your life (your blessings) and don't stop till you get to 100.

If you take that simple action, you will be taking the first step to open up your life to a whole new world of possibilities!

Here is the link again in case you still want to listen to the recording.

Count Your Blessings...in a Spreadsheet

Count your blessings. Literally, count them in a spreadsheet, and do not stop until you get to at least 100. When we begin to account for all the good things that have happened to us that we did not cause, it’s humbling. - See more at: http://www.liveintentionally.org/2010/08/05/leadership-summit-session-2-jim-collins/#sthash.FIJNjIwg.dpuf

Risk of Sinking vs Value of Swimming

Here is the audio recording if you want to just listen.

Risk of Sinking vs Value of Swimming Audio Recording

I read this quote recently, which was part of the inspiration for this post.

"We've greatly exaggerated the risk of sinking, without celebrating the value of swimming." Seth Godin - The Icarus Deception: How High Will You Fly?

As you know if you've read some of my previous posts, I work in the Information Security arena and have a pretty good understanding of risk. Sometimes I wonder if I have too good of an understanding of risk, almost to a fault where I am so aware of it that I become risk averse. This is not an uncommon trait of people working in this field. We often over emphasize the risks instead of celebrating the fact that we are swimming, or allowing the potential for making progress rather than impeding it.

When I think of this subject and swimming, I can't help but think of Diana Nyad who was in the news recently. She is the other part of the inspiration for writing and recording this post. She is an amazing 64 year old woman who swam 110 miles from Cuba to Key West in the open ocean in spite of the risk of sharks, jelly fish stings and a myriad of other serious risks. She had no significant protection while performing this dangerous task. She swam for over 53 hours! I don't think I could do much of anything, let alone swimming for that long! If you are unfamiliar with Diana and her swim click here. It is a truly inspiring story of courage and it really embodies this principle.

I talk in the recording about my fears of the ocean, and especially with movies like Jaws and shows like the Discovery Channel's Shark Week. I don't know about you, but when I am anywhere deep in the ocean I start hearing the Jaws theme music!

I can't imagine swimming 110 miles from Cuba to Key West!

Most risks we face today dwarf in comparison to the real risk of sinking that Diana Nyad faced when she ventured out to beat this goal she set for herself.

There are risks in my own life that I will exaggerate. If I write this, or put this recording online will people judge me? Will I be able to live up to what I am saying? Despite those voices, I put my words and ideas out here in the sea of voices in this Internet pool, I'm stepping out and getting my feet wet. How will this work out? That is still yet to be seen, but I believe it will be good! I would encourage you to do the same, step out and step up.

When Diana Nyad got to the shores of Key West and attained the goal she set for herself, she was tired, worn out. Despite her exhaustion, which none of us will likely ever understand. She must of had great joy in the accomplishment of completing her goal.

In the Icarus Deception, there is a theme of the concept How High will you Fly. Icarus's father told him not to fly too close to the sun and so the conventional view was one that said not to fly too high, stay in compliance, live within the box of your life, etc.

On the other viewpoint, Icarus actually had the risk of flying too low if he wasn't careful. We exaggerate how high and close to the sun we are out of fear. We may feel safer when we are lower, but the risk can actually be greater to crash and be seriously injured, or worst.

I was talking to a friend at work about fitness and we were encouraging one another and talking about fitness challenges that seem pretty significant and out of reach, such as a triathalon, iron man or a marathon. These things seem way out of my realm of possibility, however I see an example of a woman like Diana Nyad and I am inspired of the possibilities.

She wasn't competing with anyone, she wasn't in a race, but she was competing against her self and what conventional wisdom says is possible. She also obviously has a passion and a joy for swimming.

To her, the risk of sinking couldn't measure up to the joy of swimming.

Today, whatever your "risk of sinking" is, whether it is creating a post, or content like I am doing today, whether it's asking for a promotion, or starting your own business, the challenge of writing that book that has been on your heart for years. I would encourage you to be careful not to exaggerate the risk and focus rather on the celebration of the value of "swimming".

You have to do what's best for yourself and that often involves getting out of your comfort zone and taking risks. Better yet, you should strive to take big audacious risks.

I would say that if you do that, you will be amazed what can happen.

I am learning that our lives have so much opportunity to inspire others and make a real difference and long-lasting impact in the world.

The question remains....."How High Will You Fly?"

Risk of Sinking vs Value of Swimming Audio Recording

Theoretical Certainty

Theoretical Certainty: This seemingly contradictory phrase/title can sum up almost any situation that you can think up. This simple two-word phrase contains some invaluable truths when approaching virtually any situation.

How can something be theoretical and certain at the same time?

The better question may be how can anything not be theoretical and certain at any time?

This is not a riddle, nor is it some hocus-pocus exercise to get you thinking deep. It is simply the truth.

Wait, if nothing is certain, how can it be considered truth?

It can because Theoretical Certainty covers both diverging views with equal accuracy and veracity, yet it is open to either becoming the victor in any given situation.

It includes mystery and great potential for a sure outcome at the same time.

Let’s face it, life, love, career, success, failure, the meaning of life are all speculative, fluctuating and unpredictable at the same time depending on who you talk to?

In Seth Godin's book, The Icarus Deception he rightly says

"We see what we believe, not the other way around."

This means our reality will be defined by our viewpoint, or what we believe.

We could also deduce that this means we have the potential to change our reality by our belief system, and actions we take based on that belief system.

Why do certain people fail miserably in life for 45+ years then get a brilliant idea that causes them to be what many would define as “a success”?

Why does a privileged, seemingly “got-it-together” type of person end up becoming a drug user or end up squandering away a fortune many will only dream of?

Why does what seemed and appeared to be a good, strong marriage fall apart and appear to be impossible to fix?

How does a person give everything away, including their life for the promises they believe they will receive in eternity and end up making an impact and difference in the world that ripples for generations to come, but at the same time has no material possessions to show for their life?

The answer? Theoretical Certainty.

First, let’s start with the definition of each.

cer·tain·ty noun \ˈsər-t^ən-tē\

plural cer·tain·ties

Definition of CERTAINTY

1: something that is certain - <-- Click this for definition of certain. Don't you hate when definitions include the word it is defining! If you don't want to click and read deeper, it is basically Something known or proven to be true and incapable of failing.

2: the quality or state of being certain especially on the basis of evidence

the·o·ret·i·cal

/THēəˈretikəl/

Adjective

Definition of Theoretical

1.Concerned with or involving the theory of a subject or area of study rather than its practical application: "a theoretical physicist".

2.Based on or calculated through theory rather than experience or practice: "a theoretical reformer of opinions".

Synonyms

theoretic - academic - academical – speculative

If we combine parts of the two definitions in a sentence we come up with something like this:

An opinion that is sure, based on evidence that comes primarily from belief and is unique to the individual.

You got that, right? Go ahead and read that again. Ha, ha!

When looking at it like this, Theoretical Certainty becomes whatever you want it to be for you and is nothing that you can enforce or convince someone else to look at it the same way you do, likewise, no one can convince you to see it differently unless you decide to listen and choose to see things differently.

It is truly is an “Eye of the Beholder”, “One size does (not) fit all” type of motto.

I plan on exploring this principle deeper and explaining what I learn and how you can apply to your life, your happiness, your success and essentially everything you do.

If you can grasp and leverage this principle in your life, you will be way above the majority of people in this world.

Heck, many people do not know how to spell Theoretical Certainty.

This should give you confidence that you are pursuing and studying a motto that may be able to give you an edge. Disclaimer....you don't need to be able to spell Theoretical Certainty for this to work for you.

What do you think? Do you agree that something can be theoretical and certain at the same time?

What do you do when you face difficulty? Lessons learned from Job.

Do you have troubles? Are you facing, what you consider a "trial" in life? Listen to this recording to hear about what you can do when you are facing difficulties.

In this recording I talk about Job and some of the difficulties he faced, how he responded, some of the advice he received and lessons learned.

I talk about what our response to difficulties should look like.

I also address some of my own difficulties, such as the recent death of my father and how we won't always understand why difficulties happen, or have a theological answer to our real, everyday problems.

What do you do when you face difficulty? Lessons learned from Job.